There is absolutely nothing more discouraging. Than hearing people constantly
yell at one another. After growing up in a household that whenever my mother was
around there was no peace. No quiet. No tight knit family. I can't stand fighting.
When I was younger I used to "act out". Fight at school, was all in the drama &
the mix. As we grow up. SOME of us tend to realize that it's juvenile & not worth
the time and the energy to always be at someone elses throat ; yelling and screaming.
So as I sat in my room this afternoon, and heard the yelling between my brother and
my sister-in-law downstairs. I closed my eyes, and hoped that it would stop.

My neice woke me up this morning & asked me if I wanted to come shopping at
square one this morning. I was too lazy to get up, plus I'm trying not to blow my money.
Which might I add is really hard! I was like wait, what time is it. She replied 9 [something or another]. My reaction was, "Wait why aren't you at school". Her response was....
"I'm feeling sick". So, "you're feeling sick and you cannot go to school but you can go
shopping in square one?" ---- I rolled my eyes and turned over & said no. I'm not coming.
If you know me personally, & have been to my house, you know my neice is spoiled rotten
by my sister in law, & my brother is the one that pretty much lays the rules down. Which
she doesn't have to follow most of the time because her mother always bails her out. Not a
good look. So does it surprise me that he had a disappointed facial expression on his
face when my sister in law and my neice came through the front door with
shopping bags in their hands?
No! I would have looked the same way.

From his point of view. He's like, you let our daughter stay home from school whenever you
have a day off work because it's your "bonding time". Who sits down and helps her with her
school work after missing a bunch of days? What is your excuse when the teacher will want to
fail her because she's not in class to get the lesson, & then she doesn't know what she's doing
for homework, then that turns into. She doesn't do well on tests. I tell my child she cannot do
something, and you tell her it's fine. She gives both of us attitude, and your excuse for her
actions is because I'm too hard on her.

I totally understand where my brother is coming from & I'm not only saying that because
of the relationship I have with him. Now my sister in laws side. I love my daughter, and I
didn't have my mother around when I was growing up. I want my daughter to be able to come
to me with any and every issue she may have. Yes I may spoil her but it's because I love her.
I let her stay home from school on the days when I'm home because I work all the time &
you [my brother] will not bring her somewhere to go shopping if she needs to. Even if she has
money of her own. I like the fact that my daughter can talk to me about anything. & You
[my brother] haven't treated her nice since she told me you were cheating on me 4 years ago.

& This is my perspective even though I'm not a parent. A child will always love one
parent more than the other. My neice has grown up too fast, and was never given
boundaries by her mother. When she was younger and her mom used to come in
and clean her room while she was at school, my neice would come home and have
every toy out of the play box again before she was ready to go to bed. Her mother
would yell and literally cry, trying to get her point across. I think it's wrong that my
neice could be up in all the adult conversations. When my sis-in-laws friend used to
call the house crying about her man cheated on her & what not. My neice was allowed
to have her input. At 7 or 8 years old, what do you know? Why was it okay for her to
be involved? It wasn't. & Ever since the "cheating" incident with my brother. When my neice
exposed that information to her mother my brother hasn't treated her the same. He is wrong
to take the out on her. He should have been handling his business.

As parents you shouldn't fight like that infront of your child, but it happens.
You need to come together and make decisions as one instead of going after one
another. It won't work any other way. My neice needs to be disciplined, but she's
13 now. That will be tough. Her mother doesn't see that there is any problem in
the way she acts or the way she disobeys. "it's a teenage thing". Aw well, I'm just
tired of hearing them fight. I'm tired of my neice being a rude little spoiled brat.
I can't stand the yelling. MAURY I need you.

Sorry I just needed to vent. Maybe I'll be back later with a happy post.